The Beast and its Shadow
Even The Beast thinks today, he is just the shadow of his former self. Perhaps you feel that way these days? I know I do. Anxiety builds up inside of us and has no way of bursting out. I’ve been making excuses for not going on rides, not doing yoga, or anything else we are told we should be doing.
The Beast and its Shadow
Yesterday, I was heavy with sadness when I received an update on my friend’s health condition, which was anything but good. Even a long walk along the sandy beach with my golden retriever Monty, who was happily darting in and out of the ocean, couldn’t ease my pain and sorrow for him, his family, his friends. I also think daily of my dear friends who lost their son exactly three months ago today. The pain and the hole in my heart are still all too real.
In comparison with so many people who are facing serious life and health challenges, being forced into seclusion in our homes is really just a minor inconvenience for the rest of us. Yet, the world is hurting, and there is so much uncertainty we all face. It is difficult to wrap my head around the economic impact this will have on all of us, never mind people who are dying and suffering greatly from the COVID 19 virus.
But, as I look at The Beast and his shadow today, I realize-the shadow The Beast is casting is because he is lit up by the sun. Clouds have parted, and the sun is shining brighter today. I forced myself (yes, I had to force myself!) to go on a bike ride. It was already hot by the time I finally got my act together. I didn’t feel like doing anything; I just wanted to stay in my pajamas, but I knew that if I didn’t move and sweat and breathe hard for a while, I would only descend deeper into feeling heavy, unmotivated. I knew I’d be irritated and probably react with a short temper to whatever my husband did or didn’t do, say, or didn’t say. Yes, I’d be the bitch I didn’t want to be!
Getting exercise allows us to blow off at least some of the steam. When I started riding my legs were heavy, my breath short, and my knee was hurting. I contemplated turning around, but I didn’t. I made it to the top of the climb, already feeling better. I also knew I’ve earned a fun downhill ride all the way back to my home.
“Be well, stay home, and wash your hands often!”
Wherever you are today physically or mentally, go out and get some fresh air. Get exercise. Also, listen to a book while you are doing your chores. It will help you take your mind off the heavy stuff. I am listening to Educated at the moment. I like it!
We can’t ignore things around us, but we can control things within us. Take care of your self so you can be good to others and you’ll be able to notice the sun is shining brightly again!
